It does NOT rub the lotion on its skin…

Perhaps you know that my favorite movie is The Silence of the Lambs. Perhaps you did not know that. Well, now you do and that explains the title of this blog a bit. Stick with me.


Yesterday, PG “yo”ed me.


I have learned that a “yo” nearly always means peen – at least in PG speak. I’ll admit that I was shocked that he’d come see me again so soon after our last visit, but I was not going to complain. This coronavirus situation is very good for my sex life!!!

Last night I ran around the house to put away all the things that were left strewn on the floors in a weekend cleaning frenzy that was temporarily sidelined by a binge watching of that tiger documentary on Netflix. (Now, those are some messed up cat people!)

PG said he’d be at my place at 7:30 AM. I decided to ride the E train last night rather than this morning so that I could get a little extra sleep. Good decision…somehow I ended up not falling asleep until very late.

I got up at my typical 4:11 AM to feed the cats and then I went back up to bed to chill for another hour or so. My alarm signaled and I got up to brush my teeth and get into the shower. I showered, shaved my legs, and prepared to decide what I’d wear. My options are somewhat limited because most of my slutty stuff is way too much of a pain in the butt to put on for such a limited amount of time (i.e., latex and steel-boned corsets). Some of my favorite items were destroyed by PG either by his bedside knife or his bare hands. I decided on the weird pink fencenet tube dress thingy. If one is so inclined, they are easily had on Amazon for under $10.

My makeup was heavy: medium-to-dark pink lipstick (Jeffree Star brand, color: Masochist), lots of blush, and more black eye shadow and mascara than should be legal. I have to say that I thought that I looked pretty good. This tube dress thingy really hugs my curves. My hair, which has not been washed since last Thursday (typical for those of us with naturally curly hair), is starting to look a little frizzy, so I put it up in a top knot. Boom! Done.

As 7:30 grew closer, I realized that he hadn’t asked me for my address like he’s always done. I had a moment of panic because I thought that something might have happened and he wouldn’t be coming. Then, at 7:33, he texted that he was 5 minutes away. Joy!

I heard him come in the front door and I stood up at the foot of my bed to greet him. He slowly opened my bedroom door and smiled: “Oh! Good morning!” He said something else, but I can’t remember. He looked so cute today that I didn’t really hear what he said. His hair is usually kind of spiky, but today it was kind of parted over to the side. It looked very good…different…almost respectable…?

As he stripped down, I got on my knees and worshipped his Majestic Peen™. Gosh, I love that thing. He had only taken off his shirt, so he was standing with his pants and boxer briefs around his ankles. Again, there was no violent face fucking or choking during my mouth-on-peen time. Has PG – pardon the pun – softened? Last night he said I should be prepared for hard anal and that he was going “to severely abuse both holes”. Split infinitive aside, I was excited.

He said, “Get up on the bed and play wit your pussy.” Yes, he said “wit”, not “with”. It is his accent. It also made me really crave a Philly cheesesteak! (From the Philadelphia Inquirer, below is generally how you order said foodstuff, though it can vary some from one place to the next.) My personal cheesesteak preference? WHIZ WIT, please!!!!!!! [a cheesesteak with Cheez Whiz (“whiz”) and onions (“wit”)]

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I got onto the bed and bent over to play with myself as he got naked. PG came up behind me and worshiped my fat butt. He stroked and caressed it. He jiggled it and said how much he loves it. “Turn over,” he said. I got on my back and he pulled me close to him as he stood against my bed. He put my ankles up by his head and he caressed my pussy. “You have such a beautiful cunt. It is so pretty, so smooth! How can it be so perfect?” CP can vouch for me. PG likes to touch my pussy area all over…he spreads it apart, squeezes it, pets it, and just gazes at it in wonder. He is a simple man.


After sufficient pussy-gazing time, he pushed himself into me slowly…inch by glorious inch. PG’s praise of my pussy continued. “Open up for Daddy,” he whispered. I let my legs open wider and as he slid in and out, on the “in” motion, the exquisite pain rushed through me. A vagina is only so long, though it does nearly double in size when a woman is in a state of arousal. I am a woman and I was definitely in a state of arousal. Even my expert vagina can’t hold all of him, so the tip of his cock touched my cervix repeatedly – painful and pleasurable all at the same time. He’s a liver-lifter for sure! (If you’re on Twitter, give a follow to @WhoresofYore – you’ll thank me later.)

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Just like on Friday, though, there was very little pounding and ramming like he sometimes does when he has to do a quick in-out. It was very sensual, if not a little weird. I’m not really saying that our sex is normal, but it is less…something…I might slightly prefer this new PG. Maybe. I’m not sure.

PG was now ready for my ass – and I was ready for him to be in my ass. Again he took time to look at it. He is a visual person, so I know he looks at my body like that so that he can rub one out to me when he is home. He put his cock back inside of my pussy to coat it in my wetness and then he entered my ass. We started out in the missionary position, but he asked me to lift my butt off of the bed and he got in there very deep in this new position. My legs were by his head as he drove into me. He watched each movement of his cock sliding in and out of my ass.

PG asked me to slide back on the bed so that he could get on the bed as well. I did so without disconnecting myself from his cock. #hoskills When we had properly maneuvered, he grabbed my left leg and pushed it toward and on top of my right leg. I was sort of in an approximate 90-degree angle as he was fucking my ass slowly. Each shift in position, no matter how minor, can lead to different sensations. He definitely was hitting a different spot. I had moved my left arm so that it was resting on my left side, but he asked me to move it. “I want to see all of your curves.” *swoon*

For so many years I have been told that I am fat and that I should not be fat. Even when I didn’t think I was fat, people still called me fat. It is discouraging and unnecessary. Plane Guy has made me feel better about my body because he appreciates all of my curvy bits. If you have ever felt badly about how your body looks and then someone comes along and says that he LOVES how your body looks, it is a big fucking deal. Thank you, Plane Guy.

He, once again, continued fucking my ass, but we pivoted 90 degrees on my bed so that our feet were at the foot of the bed. My legs were spread wide and I was on my stomach. He never skipped a stroke as we repositioned ourselves. The man has skills. I brought my ass up and was slowly grinding as he was deep inside of me. “Easy, Princess,” he encouraged. It was not quite time for us to cum. “Put your legs together, babe. You like me in your ass, don’t you?” I managed to moan, “Mmmmmmmm…Yeeeessssssss.” I love when he calls me “babe”.

I put my legs together as he put his weight on me and deeply fucked my ass, which made me cum. PG followed soon after. He came on my back in volumes that I have not previously experienced with him. (Side note: I love listening to him groan as he cums.) It was, in all honesty, shocking. I don’t know how often he cums, but the amount of ejaculate he produced today would lead me to believe that he hasn’t cum in weeks! I know he came last Friday, but I would find it unfathomable that he didn’t cum since then. He is just a high-volume ejaculator, I guess.

Yes, he got a towel and de-spermed by back and then he got into the shower. He seemed endlessly fascinated with my Clarisonic face brush. I explained what it is used for and let him try it. He asked me to text him the information so that he can get one himself. I then explained that he should moisturize after he uses it and he was repulsed. After all, the brush removes dead skin cells, and then one is meant to moisturize the fresh skin.

This is when I learned a new tidbit about PG: He gets skeeved out with lotion! (Hence the title of the blog, y’all!) He told me that he doesn’t like how his skin feels slippery after lotion. I had put body butter on my legs (and my whole body) before PG arrived, so I gave him my leg and asked if I was slimy. He said YES. lolol…but he said that it didn’t bother him on me, but on him it was skeevy. I said it would help to maintain his tattoos, but he was repulsed by the thought of rubbing the lotion on his skin. I went into the bathroom and got a bottle of the argan oil that I use every day. I put ONE DROP on the back of his hand and I rubbed it into his skin (or else he’d get the hose again, right?). He was impressed and he asked me to text him the information so he could order some for himself. He went into the hallway to investigate his hand in the light. Boys are so weird.

Also, when he was leaving, the kitten made her appearance at the front door. She was absolutely enamored with PG! She doesn’t meow, but she sort of coos. She was cooing continuously as PG bent down to pet her and talk to her sweetly. He used his “animal voice”. (You know…the high-pitched voice people use to talk to animals if they love animals.) I’ve never seen her react that way to anyone before. Right before he walked out the door, he went in for some more kitten scritches on her head. It was endearing.

I can’t say for certain when PG will be back…but I’m kind of not hating this lockdown situation. He is stuck in the house with Orangina other than when he is at work. I’m his escape and sanctuary for as long as he’ll have me.

…and always remember: Ho is life, y’all!

Sluttily yours,
#notesfromaslut #honeytoes #hoislife

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