A whore-easter

You get it, right? Like a Nor’easter?? Don’t you people watch The Weather Channel? Here on the east coast of the US, we have suffered four of those bastard storms in the course of three weeks. Hi. It’s SPRING now, you fucking cunt, Mother Nature! Knock it the fuck off and go fuck yourself.

What had happened was…

Over the last two or so weeks, PG has been all up in my giblets with texts. Back on March 10th, he texted me. “WTF happened to you? You hate me or something?” It hadn’t been that long since we had co-mingled, so I was surprised to hear from him. Also, it was a Saturday morning when he is usually with Orangina. I texted back and so it began. I asked if he was free the next week and he said yes and then he asked how my holes were and whether I liked having them stretched. I said that my holes could use some attention. Of course he asked for pics of my “big ass”. Again he asked if I liked having them stretched since I didn’t answer him before. While it was painful, I told him that I liked doing it because he loves it so much.

More texts between us followed and he asked for MORE pics. Jesus, man. I told him that I’d not send more until he sent me something. What can I say? I was in a mood. Taking pics is a whole thing for me…hair gotta be did, face beat, legs shaved, yadda yadda yadda…Him? He just points the camera at his wang and there you go! He replied: “You can play that game. It won’t work out well. Your job is to stimulate me.” Still in a snit, I got saucy and replied: “Seriously. You can’t send one lousy pic? I do everything you ask me to do.” BAM! He sent two dick pics of his Majestic Peen™. I’m tired of writing. Here are some texts from after he sent his pics:

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Balls. We’re back on the piss thing again, are we? Anyhoo, I sent more pics and he informed me that he’d be using them later to cum. “I probably won’t be cumming alone. But I will be using your material. So send me more.” Well, bully for you, PG. In a HIGHLY uncharacteristic move, I replied that I had to run out to do errands and that maybe I’d send more later. Like, I don’t think I have ever pushed him off like that before. I was shocked. I guess PG was shocked, too, because 7 minutes later, my phone rang. It was PG! May I please remind y’all that this would only be the 7th time (I believe) that we have spoken on the phone?

I figured he had accidentally dialed me, so I let it ring, but it kept ringing. Okay…so I answered. I’ll spare you the details, but the reason he called is because he was worried about me. I guess my shortness with him via text puzzled his man brain. He said that I didn’t seem like my regular, happy self and he asked if I was alright. He has his moments of sweetness. PG informed me that “she is on her way over, so I’ll have to fuck her.” That is a weird thing to say to me. I wish I could remember what I said to him, but I said something that made PG laugh. It was a genuine, lovely laugh and I don’t often hear him laugh when we are together. Anyhoo, the call ended and I was kind of pleased with my day. I said I’d send more pics tomorrow (Sunday).

Well. I sent pics…lots of pics – really good pics – and there was no response. Weekends are for Orangina, so I was not surprised. I was surprised, though, that I didn’t get a reply even on Monday. I sent him a text asking if we’d get together this week. Silence. Fucker.

I didn’t text him on Tuesday and he didn’t text me. God. Fucking. Dammit.

On Wednesday morning I texted that I found his lack of attention to filling my holes vexing, to which he replied, “WTF”. I said that I thought we were fucking this week, but he didn’t reply to my pics. He said he didn’t get any pics. I believe him because that has happened before on occasion when I send them from the Google folder. So? I re-sent them. He approved, stating, “OMFG. Jesus. More”. Oh, and in case I forgot, he reminded me that my “cunt and asshole are divine”. And then he got back on the stretching thing. Oy vey.

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So, yeah. Hole tearing. No, thank you! Not even for PG. Even a slut has her limits.

He asked for more pics, specifically showing my teeth and lips and doing oral on a dildo. I had a lot of work to finish, so I said that I would do it on Saturday.

I visited the dirty store on Saturday. I bought two new dildos, dildo cleaner, and two edible candles. Frankly, I’m not sure I’ll use the candles for sex stuff. They just smelled really yummy!

I got home with my stash of new toys and got to it. I sent two pics and he asked me to do a shoot with all black makeup. I sent the rest of this batch of pics and told him I would do the black makeup later that evening. Just in case I didn’t understand what he wanted, he texted:

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Aw, shucks, PG…I’m always hot? Oh, that pleases me so!

I did as he asked. The makeup looked hella hot (love the black makeup!!!) and even I was impressed with the photos. He was thrilled. Oh, here’s something new. I believe that I may have figured out why PG always asks me to wear very whorish makeup. He likes trannies, right? Yeah. Trannies wear fuck-tons of makeup. I think he wants me to look like a tranny. Whatever. I don’t care. I’ll do it if it will result in his cock entering my holes.

The conversation then turned to details of our next meeting, allegedly this week. He wanted to cum in my mouth and on my teeth and watch me play with it and let it run out of my mouth. Oh, and there would be no dildos this time – just pussy and anal. It has been a hot minute since I had only his cock inside of me! I’m too lazy too look, but I suspect it has been months.

He asked for yet more photos, but this time he wanted me to do oral on a dildo with both of my holes filled. *sigh* I complied. “Holy fuck. Jesus.” PG was pleased, though I, myself, did not find them appealing.

I mentioned to PG that I had a hair appointment this week and told him that I might make my hair purple. He responded, “Do it. Please.” Um. I’ll do it if I feel like it. Unless you’re paying for my hair, PG, you have no say in what I do with it. Sheesh.

Oh, and once again, PG started the pee talk. He wanted to pee on me and in me. Specifically, he wanted to pee in my mouth and then into my pussy so that I could fuck it out of myself with a dildo. I told him I would try to manage the mouth-peeing stuff as best as I could. He told me I was a good girl. 🙂 #goodgirl

Can I please just tell y’all that he spent hours texting with me that day? Like, on a Saturday afternoon all the way up to after 10:00 pm. Whatevs. PG then texted me on Sunday morning asking me to fuck my ass and pussy with the dildos suctioned to a surface and video it. Christ. I’ll spare you the details, but after a few hours of napping and then trying to physically configure the dildos, a flat surface (my toilet seat, if you’re wondering), and my holes, I finally managed to send him a quick 10-second clip of just that. Rave reviews. Obvi. We again texted a few hours that Sunday night. Where is Orangina through all this?? Surely he wasn’t spending that much time texting me with her there…right??

Tuesday was my hair appointment and the beginning of yet another Nor’easter. Gah!! I’m sorry, but a little sleet and freezing rain will not keep me from a hair appointment. I went with my bright red on top and a vibrant purple on the bottom. It was 4 hours that I spent in my hair stylist’s chair. #thestruggleisreal Life is too short for boring hair, though, so I persevered. It looks pretty keen, y’all! While I was at my hair appointment, I texted PG to see if Thursday would work for him. No reply. Bollocks.

Anyhoo, we got around 11 or 12 inches (of snow) here through Wednesday and that afternoon, he said it was looking bad for Thursday because all of his meetings got pushed off – “a fucking mess”, apparently…

During one of my Thursday meetings, I took a selfie to show PG my new hair colors and he replied, “OMFG”. Then he asked how late I could come tonight (meaning Thursday). Your slut Honeytoes replied, “Anytime” because that is how this ho rolls. #anytime #havepussywilltravel #slutonthego He had to go into the city, but he said “if it’s not retarded late” that he would text me on his way back. Yeah, right.

Around 7:30 or so, I texted him to say that instead of being in the city, he should be in my cunt. I fully expected no response or a negative one. I still had my face on, just in case, but figured nothing would happen, so I put on an ill-gotten hotel robe and sat down to watch Ru Paul’s Drag Race. My phone screamed out “Lacroix, sweetie!” at 8:25. I put the Do Not Disturb thing on my phone starting at 8:00 pm each night and there are only a few chosen ones who can bypass that. One of them is PG, of course. I looked at the phone and the message was, indeed, from PG and it said: “10”.

Let’s do a little math, people. I did not have my black makeup done…just regular makeup. My legs were not shaved. I did ride the E-train earlier, though, thank merciful Christ. I wrote back and told him my black makeup was not done (as he had requested during one of our texting frenzies) and that it would take 30 minutes for me to do so. I am 90 minutes from him, so there was no fucking way that I could be there by 10:00. He said it would be too late for me to get there at 10:30. (“That’s a bit too late, doll.”) Oh hell fucking naw! I offered up my normal makeup instead of the goth-tranny extravaganza he asked for and at 8:30, he agreed. I hopped into the shower and shaved my legs hella fast. I slid into a body stocking, put on my boots, and texted him that I was on my way at 8:38. I beat my own record. #hoskills

I made it there just before 10:00, just a few minutes after PG himself got there. It was all a blur and I’m sure I’ll end up with a speeding ticket thanks to the fine folks at E-Z Pass, but it was worth it, as you will now learn.

Up to his bedroom I went. I dropped my bags and he said that he had just gotten in himself and that this would be a quickie. Fine with me. He told me to remove my coat and he stared appreciatively at my body. He removed his t-shirt and shorts and I saw something that I had never seen before: a flaccid PG cock. I was mesmerized. He was on the bed and I pounced and worked his cock like the good girl he knows that I am. The feeling of it growing hard in my mouth was transcendent. I felt such power in my mouth!

Having properly fluffed PG’s Majestic Peen™, he asked me to get on my knees and he positioned himself behind me. The thorough tongue reaming that I received was unexpected. He usually gives a little oral love to my butthole before we fuck, but today it was all about my ass and his mouth. PG was a man on a mission and he kissed, licked, and sucked on my ass for much longer than he has done in a while. I was pleasantly surprised. This was a proper session of ass worshiping! I could not stop moaning, cursing, and gyrating my ass into his face while he worked me over with his most talented tongue.

PG then went onto his back and commanded, “Sit on my face!” Yes, Daddy!! My fat ass was soon the only thing in PG’s sight as it lowered onto his bearded face. He ate my ass, spanked it, bit it, grabbed it hard, jiggled it, and kissed it. A few times I leaned forward to suck his cock, but he kept pulling me back onto his face. I don’t remember ever seeing him so ravenous for my #rosebud before. It was a nice change from all of the DP and TP he’s been so obsessed with recently.

He pushed me away from his face and got behind me to eat my ass again. Divine bliss it was. Then he pushed me down onto my stomach and leaned next to me on his right side. I looked over at him as he continued to stroke and jiggle my ass. He looked me in my eyes and…He fucking kissed me.

ytho

It wasn’t just a smooch like when I leave his house. No, kids, this was some full-on making out with, like, tongues and all! It shocked the ever-loving snot out of me! It was unreal…so fucking sexy to kiss him like that and to taste myself on him. We were both in rare form tonight, I guess.

Then PG decided he needed more of my perfect ass. I got onto my knees and arched my back like my life depended on it. “Arch that back for Daddy! Make that ass big!” He told me that I should not lose even one pound, bless his heart. He put his hands on my waist and said, “Ugh! This tiny waist!” Um, thanks, PG! I guess from his point of view, it looked tiny, so I’ll take the compliment! As I was on my knees, he stood behind me and shook my ass with his hands before once again diving face-first in between my ample white cheeks and dining on my hiney hole. (Honeytoes’ extra tip: If you have never dealt with a true analingus connoisseur before, please hurry out and find one. Would they be referred to as analinguists?? You’ll thank me later.) #rimming #rimjob

PG finally put the head of his cock against my pussy and I leaned back to take him inside of me. After all of that anal love, I was so ready for him to be inside of me. PG fills my pussy perfectly. He slowly fucked me, taking care to watch my bouncy ass. I started to get incredibly worked up and began to grind on his cock, but he said, “Easy, Princess.” I guess PG was pretty worked up, too.

“Do you want Daddy in your ass, Princess?” he softly asked. “Yes, please,” said I and he took his cock out of my pussy and put it slowly into my ass. YES!!!! I had to control myself because we were both pretty excited. Once again, he focused on watching my ass bounce to the rhythm of us fucking. It is some work to hold one’s ass up high with a severe back arch while someone is violating one’s ass, but I managed just fine, thank you! PG knows that I really love to be flat on my stomach with my legs together during anal, so he asked if I wanted to change positions. I told him that I did, and we perfectly re-positioned ourselves. Yes, his dick stayed inside of my pussy during the position change. #hoskills

He was on top of me – skin against skin. His arms were outstretched before me and I put my arms on his as he slowly and deliberately drove his cock in and out of my ass. PG directed me to push out on his dick and then to pull him inside of me. If I had not ridden the E-train, things could have been quite unpleasant with all of the pushing out.

Eventually, he asked where I wanted his cum. Since my hair was freshly did, I told him to stay away from my hair and I suggested my ass. “You ready, Princess?” he asked. I said I was ready and he carefully withdrew his cock from my ass and came all over my ass and back. PG has the most intense orgasms of any of the men I have fucked. It is a whole-body situation with A LOT of cum. Like, really…a lot of fucking cum. Think Peter North volume. The way he grunts and moans as his balls empty onto me is such a turn on for me.

Our interaction tonight was different. I feel as if he might have been concerned about all of the extreme things he’s been doing with me and asking for. For whatever reason, tonight was all about PG pleasing Honeytoes and I didn’t hate it!

I should note that I came a few times during the eating of my ass, but I forgot to add that above. I’m too tired to do so now…It is 2:30 am and I have to get up at 4:16 am. Good dick is worth losing sleep, though – especially PG’s! I am sorry if this post seems disjointed, but I am dead tired…Good night, bitches!

…and always remember: Ho is life, y’all!

Sluttily yours,
Honeytoes
#notesfromaslut #honeytoes #hoislife

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