No, there’s no Christmas miracle up in here. There will be no Christmas #peen for this slut. Fuck this shit. It doesn’t seem likely that I’ll be getting any #dick till 2018. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again:
For you, dear readers, I can offer you only a very lame attempt at slightly plagiarized song lyrics with a ho-ish twist. They should be sung to the song “Santa Baby” or maybe not at all…
Santa baby, slip a penis into my V for me. Been an awfully good slut. Santa baby, put it in my butthole tonight!
I know. It is awful. Maybe you’ve heard that I am uninspired when my #holes are woefully empty. Obviously, I was far too lazy to rewrite the whole song. Maybe I should have sat on Santa’s lap and bounced my booty up and down while asking for a fat cock. Ugh. Live and learn.
Wait. Maybe it should have been “PG baby” or “Man Bun baby” instead. “PG baby” seems to work better than “Man Bun baby”, but either way, I’m not rewriting it. I’m tired.
Merry Fucking Christmas to all y’all. Meh.
…and always remember: Ho is life, y’all!
#notesfromaslut #honeytoes #hoislife