A candle in the wind…er…pussy??

Let it be known that PG is the King of all the Cunt Teases. #cunttease His birthday was last week and I sent him a birthday text.

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<nudes sent>

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My #holes and I attended meetings all day. (I work from home.) It was unpleasant, but it is how I earn money for my cats, shiny things, man whores, and Vegas trips. I thought about what I could do to pique PG’s interest and then it hit me: Put a birthday candle in your pussy, light it, and take a pic! Duh! (Honeytoes’ extra tip: First of all, it is “pique”, kids, not “peak” or “peek”. Jesus. Stupid is not sexy, y’all. Second? Girls, if you decide to do this, I kindly recommend that you do it QUICKLY, lest you burn your precious pussy lips/hole. My mistake was that the camera timer was set to 2 seconds. Two. Precious. Seconds. Do not set the timer for 2 seconds. Just don’t do it. Do it without a timer. You’ll thank me later. Oh, take several pics, too…my lighting was off, but there was no time to futz with it. I was on a mission. Those fucking candles burn quickly. If you burn your twat, don’t come cryin’ to me, mmmmmkay?)

It should be noted that I’d have preferred to put the candle into my asshole, but I wasn’t up for a trip to the urgent care place to ask them to dress my ass wound. I have a difficult time taking ass pics without a fiery candle sticking out of my rosebud, so trying it alone would be ill-advised. My friend would have assisted me with the candle/ass situation, but the weather was shite and she lives (on a good day) a hour or so away.

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Yep, that’s the candle in question.

<candle-in-pussy pics taken and sent> No, I am not posting that photo here. That is for PG’s eyes/cock only…unless you send cash first. #hmu

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I guess PG liked my creative take on a birthday surprise, eh?

Obviously, the question is: Will Honeytoes fuck PG this week? Honeytoes wants to, but he is now apparently a Monday-night-only fuck. The last time we fucked NOT on a Monday was in June…all encounters since then have been on Mondays. I have a hair appointment Monday that will go till at least 6:00 pm, thereby interfering with my prep time to blossom into the perfect slut that PG so desires. I also have meetings all day long on Monday. I will say that I was surprised for his offer of cock since we saw each other less than 2 weeks ago. My manicured fingers are crossed, though I fully did not expect that I’d see PG till 2018…If I see him this week, I’ll be most pleased.

Stay tuned.

Oh, and CP? I wrote this blog for you! Consider it life support or whatever. Please don’t die. My blog is nothing without your kind words. #clams4life #assholesandcunts Love ya!

…and always remember: Ho is life, y’all!

Sluttily yours,
Honeytoes
#notesfromaslut #honeytoes #hoislife

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