Guys. Seriously. It has been a week since I had peen. A week!! I'm miserable. Twitchy. I'll likely never have sex again. WHY HAVE ALL OF MY GO-TO PEENS FORSAKEN MEEEEE?????? I hate men. Blah, blah, blah... (Does that seem right to you, CP?) When I have thoughts like that, I try to stay calm.… Continue reading Flashback – August 1989 – And so it begins
During my Thanksgiving Vegas trip this week, I was Snapchatting up a storm. It was a little obnoxious, but at least I was Snapping something other than my cats or pics of me with animal ears and whiskers. I do love that Snapchat. This, of course, means that it is no longer cool. One of… Continue reading Oi! Anyone fancy a cuckake?
Yesterday was Thanksgiving here in 'Murica and your favorite slut was proper stuffed. (That's how they say it, innit, Nicola? Pissflaps forever!!! Miss you!! Quality.) Oh, how very cliché I am. Yes, I am thankful for peen...only the good peen, though, duh. You know that I search far and wide to find only the best… Continue reading There’s been an incident.
This teeny update is meant to let y'all know that: I am considering password protecting certain posts in the future (in case I post a photo of my huge ass or something that I don't want my actual IRL friends to see - also considering posting dick pics for shits and giggles). If I institute… Continue reading F.Y.I.
Horngry? Ya. Horny + hungry (for peen) = a very out-of-sorts Honeytoes (Of course, "out-of-sorts" = bitch on wheels.) Thanks, CP, for finding the graphic whilst my holes were getting pounded...I just zhuzhed it up a bit. After getting back from my business trip and having had a very bizarre set of texts the day… Continue reading I’m not me when I’m horngry.
I said... Y'all, I don't really know how it happened - or why. PG texted me on Monday afternoon (yesterday) to say that he might be able to see me this week. I was beyond pleased. #obvi Then he said which day would work for him: Thursday. Curses!!! Your girl Honeytoes is going out of… Continue reading ERMAHGERD